Tuesday, May 25, 2010


Why the blog name Rachel? Well, I have the biggest butt many people have ever seen, bless its heart...uhhm, er...cheek? I'm trying the whole "see everything in a positive light" mental project and one of the good things about having said butt is that it provides a soft place to land where ever I may fall - and I do fall, I'm clumsy and a bit un-co, so I'm certainly grateful for a bit of bounce when I take a stack. So you see, landsoftly, is a tribute to the butt, clever you say? Aye that it is, but thats the way the butt wanted it so lets direct all the applause to the blog's deserving namesake.

A little more about my butt you ask? Sure...My unique combination of mismatched hip and waist sizes means there is nothing else for this part of connecting body to be than this marvelous big butt. It really does the best job you could ask of a butt to connect a top and bottom half that you would never think to pair together. At times in the past I have referred to it as a shelf - if I didn't sit down occasionally it's depth is suffice to provide the perfect place to arrange a display of family photographs, and, to be fair, even then it still sticks out enough to hold the odd nicknack. I did contemplate calling the blog The Shelf but that name doesn't sound quite so well loved. 

The big butt has been getting some new digs lately, some new jeans, some cargos (whatever will the butt and I do with all those pockets? we have been thinking we should take up orienteering just to do the pants justice and fill the pockets with compasses, maps and all kinds of outdoor frivolity) and some tremendously chic black pants. In fact, the black pants were quite the nsv and prompted me to let the Two Fit Chicks about them. It was letting those amazing idols of mine know about it (and Carla's completely gorgeous reply) that got me thinking more seriously about beginning this here blog.

The butt can be quite opinionated - it has an absolute distain of skimpy knickers and a love of proper undies, thunderpants are by far its favourite - they may look like nanna's britches or, for those who remember the days of Kylie Mole, the epitamy of bogan undies - but in the butt's opinion the most comfy undies ever. And, you know, I think it knows what its talking about. They come all the way from the N of Z and they're not budget buys but what this butt wants it tends to get :)

So on the one hand I have a big butt, there is no camouflaging it with appropriately long tops or drawing attention elsewhere; this I've tried and it seems that highlighting something else only makes the butt show off even more and take the limelight right back. But on the other hand I have a big butt that provides portable cushioning and, should I ever need to display a line of goods to the people behind me, a perfectly good shelf :)

No comments:

Post a Comment