So I told my dearest friend about my blog - I call her the bff in jest (because we are far too mature for that kind of term :) ) but she is in every sense of the term that to me. It was a big deal because I have been running around quite ashamed of this body and the extra poundage it carries. I know its dumb, but its one of those things where you think if you don't mention it no-one will notice. Like no-one will notice the double chin if you have long hair, and no-one will notice the flabby arms if you wear long sleeves - these illusions we create just to deal with what we're ashamed of.
I half thought about keeping my blog a secret from everyone, convincing myself it was a place "just for me" and not for other people in my everyday life to know about. But, I know the real reason is shame and I'm determined to work on that just as much as I work on my diet and my booty. Mr C runs around telling everyone that he's on this weight loss health kick and I cringe into the corner thinking "don't point out that we're overweight you ninny".
But you know, people are always so supportive when he tells them, not judgmental at all, no-one has ever said "well how the hell did you get to the point of needing to lose weight". Well, I am making a change and trying to look at this body as one on its way to healthy-ness rather than one with extra baggage. Its what I do now that matters, not what I've done to get here.
I tell the bff basically everything in my life, but I didn't tell her how much my weight was an issue for me, how extremely overweight I was and how far I still have to go. She knows I've been getting more serious about weight loss and getting fit because, as I said I tell her everything, when I tell her I've been on a hike or cooking this, that or the other its pretty clear. And, bless her to bits, she notices when I lose a gram and showers me with compliments.
I'm not about to put my blog on the front cover of my local newspaper, baby steps here people, but I'm owning up to whats going on and letting the most important people in my life know about it. And, of course, she responded exactly as I knew she would, full of praise, love and said she only wants me happy and healthy - so here's to happy and healthy.